Good morning! It's my Friday off and what a lovely morning it is! The heat hasn't picked up yet so there is a nice, cool breeze blowing through my open windows. I am sitting at my computer, enjoying a nice cup of coffee, with my two dogs cuddling at my feet. I am feeling grateful this morning.
Today marks 11 weeks since my surgery--just one week short of 3 months. As of this morning, I am down 46 lbs. It feels great! I am shrinking so much. My pants especially are looser on me from one day to the next. I have to confess that I am loving this. It feels so good to say goodbye to the fat that I've been weighed down with for the majority of my life. This saying goodbye is not just goodbye to fat, it's to all of the events, all of the emotions that lead me to indulge in sugary sweetness, that told my body to store and hold on to everything I ate. Goodbye pain, heartache, loss, disappointment, fear, anxiety, worry, strife. Goodbye to insecurity, feelings of worthlessness, sorrow, despair.
There have been some very dark times in my life. I held on to so many things inside of me. I never realized how those emotions that I was holding on to were affecting my physical body. That "holding on" part of me is broken (Thank you God!), and I am letting it all go. It's all shriveling up and disappearing, just like the layers of fat on my body. I am thankful. I am grateful. I believe with all of my heart that this surgery saved my life, in more ways than just physical.
Today is a brand new day. I am working on the brand new me. Well, maybe it's not the brand new me. It's the me that's been hidden. Reflecting on all of this reminds me of what a great Father I have. No matter what, He is faithful. He is with me. He loves the real me, in spite of the ugliness. And I don't mean the outside ugliness, but the ugly things that I've held on to inside of my heart.
Today is a brand new day. I am thankful for another day with my handsome, amazing husband. I am thankful for the time that I have with my sisters, my parents, my grandmother. I am thankful for my dogs, my babies, who love me unconditionally.
Today is a brand new day. I am thankful. Are you?
Peace, Love and Joy,
Rachel
I didn't know you had surgery! Good for you! Did you know I had that surgery too? (Well, gastric bypass... think you had a slightly different one, right?) That was what changed my life and turned things around so that I could carry Brayden full term!! It's an amazing journey and I would do it all again! :) It will be a euphoric year for you, that's for sure! Congrats!!
ReplyDeleteThanks Brooke. I think I heard somewhere that you had surgery, but wasn't for sure. I had "the sleeve," Vertical Sleeve Gastrectomy. They basically made my stomach pouch but didn't re-route my intestines. The left over part of my stomach was removed. My stomach kind of looks like a skinny banana, thus the term "sleeve." I'm glad to hear that you would choose surgery again :)
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